Chucking Gina Ford's bossy baby book in the bin was the best thing I ever did! As the parenting guru you either love or hate gives her first interview in 17 years, the mums who prove Gina Ford hasn't lost her power to divide...

Her bestselling book sold much than a cardinal copies and for astatine slightest a decade she was nan babe slumber guru, celebrated for nan strictness of her feeding authorities and fame among moving mothers.

But what was her argumentation connected crying? At nan play Gina Ford gave her first question and reply successful 17 years and amazed galore of america by saying that she has 'never advised parents to fto their babies outcry it out'. Instead, pursuing her methods correctly intends 'there should not beryllium a batch of crying'.

So what really happened to nan procreation of caller mothers who followed Gina Ford's methods? Four writers callback their experience, pinch varying degrees of success...

Clare Foges: 'Like a sergeant screaming your boots aren't shiny' 

Ah, nan halcyon days of early parenthood. So deliriously tired was I that I chucked my keys successful nan fridge, dispersed pesto connected my toast and often fell dormant mid-conversation, rima wide arsenic nan Blackwall Tunnel, dribbling.

Why didn't my babe slumber properly? When would I ever shower? How could I reintroduce a modicum of power complete my life?

Desperate for answers, 3am googling led maine to a sanction revered and loathed by parents successful adjacent measure: Gina Ford. Queen of routine, goddess of getting your kid to slumber done nan night.

When it comes to parenting a newborn, Ford is astir arsenic relaxed arsenic 1 of those service sergeants who screams successful nan look of rookies because their boots aren't shiny enough.

Baby has to beryllium up and fed earlier 7am – sharp! Baby must ne'er beryllium cuddled to sleep! No — repetition — nary oculus interaction pinch babe successful nan evening!

For some, this attack has been helpful. A friend of excavation who sewage her twins into clockwork regular says if she'd had a 3rd kid it would person been called Gina aliases Gino. For me, though, parenting nan Ford measurement was miserable.

So hopeless was I for shut-eye that for a mates of weeks I followed her attack to nan letter. Maddeningly, my girl wouldn't play ball.

When Gina said she should beryllium awake, her eyes were drooping, pinch maine frantically blowing successful her look to effort to support her conscious ('No! This isn't allowed for different 17 minutes!').

When Gina said she should beryllium feeding, her rima would beryllium clamped shut. Worst, erstwhile she was expected to beryllium napping, she would coo successful her cot aliases cry.

I callback sitting successful nan acheronian sobbing, resisting those age-old instincts to prime up and cuddle my babe because Gina implied that if I did I'd beryllium creating a rod for my ain back.

Indeed, successful caller days Ford has scoffed astatine nan request to comfortableness your kid physically: 'They show you to stone your babe to sleep... They don't show you that you could look hellhole successful 7 months' clip erstwhile your babe can't get to slumber without being rocked aliases fixed a dummy,' she said successful her first question and reply for 17 years. 'Hell'? You could spot cuddling your kid arsenic hell, I suppose, aliases you could spot it arsenic person to Heaven.

Another soul-destroying facet of Gina Ford parenting is that it ties you to nan location for ample chunks of nan day.

Since she insists that babe must nap successful their cot successful a darkened room, walks successful nan sun and java pinch friends are sacrificed to The Routine. In conscionable a mates of weeks this semi-imprisonment sent maine doolally and borderline depressed.

Ford's fame is down to nan quick-fix property we unrecorded in. We making out 21st-century creatures want offspring who will slot into a neat baby-shaped spread successful our lives and beryllium arsenic predictable arsenic clockwork. 

But successful my acquisition (I now person 4 children) nan babe days are meant to beryllium all-consuming, life-upending, unpredictable and messy. Anyone led to judge their babe should beryllium successful a regular by 4 weeks, sleeping done by six weeks and dancing nan hornpipe by 8 is successful for a shock.

So aft my little brushwood pinch Ford parenting, I submitted to reality and became a enslaved to immoderate my babe wanted. Now connected my fourth, I provender her erstwhile she wants, fto her nap erstwhile she wants, respond to her cries, cuddle her to slumber and co-sleep, each things that Ford nary uncertainty disapproves of.

But you cognize what? Letting nan babe lead nan measurement isn't conscionable nicer for her; it's alternatively much relaxing for maine too.

Lucy Cavendish: 'When I vessel fed, friends thought I failed' 

I first 'met' Gina Ford erstwhile I had my 2nd son, Leonard, successful 2003.

At that point, her baby-training manual, The New Contented Little Baby Book, was required reference for each caller mother.

All my friends 'did' nan Gina Ford method, which fundamentally progressive putting your babe — your mini small babe — connected a very strict schedule pinch very precise deadlines to meet.

So galore mothers swore by it, saying that their babies were eating and sleeping for illustration a dream, and arsenic my eldest, Raymond, had been a unspeakable sleeper and eater, I decided to springiness it a spell pinch Leonard.

I person nary thought what possessed me. As soon arsenic I looked astatine nan section headings, I should person thrown it retired of nan window.

Baby has to study to hold to beryllium fed. Baby must beryllium put successful his ain room almost from Day One. Baby cannot beryllium picked up.

Baby has to beryllium trained for illustration a labrador aliases a poodle to fresh successful pinch this schedule, which isn't his schedule but yours. What it each seemed to adhd up to was a script successful which, if you followed this draconian regime, you would person a life that felt arsenic if you had ne'er had a babe astatine all.

But present is nan problem. Babies are disruptive small creatures. They are expected to outcry and wail. They don't cognize what other to do to get your attention.

And they emotion being picked up and cuddled, and to snuggle up for a bully lukewarm feed.

What babies don't for illustration is being near for hours connected end. They don't for illustration being put connected schedules. I recovered nan full process unbelievably upsetting. It went against each azygous small heart I had arsenic a mother.

As soon arsenic small Lennie cried, each nervus ending successful my assemblage jangled. My desire to prime him up was overwhelming.

I couldn't carnivore leaving him unsocial to wail and activity himself up into a authorities of red-faced meltdown. I loathed not feeding him connected demand.

Every clip I publication much of Ford — and I re-read her endlessly to bolster my resoluteness — I ended up hating some her, pinch her strict methods, and myself for not having nan will of robust you would request to adhere to them.

In nan end, I caved. I conscionable threw nan book successful nan bin and went backmost to nan benignant of warm, cuddly baby-centric parenting my full being longed to do.

However, others did instrumentality pinch it, and, yes, I cognize they thought I had failed.

We would beryllium successful a cafe, Lennie would sniffle and I would get a vessel retired aliases provender him myself and springiness him a cuddle, and nan others would rotation their eyes successful vexation astatine my deficiency of discipline.

Surely I was spoiling him — and my ain life astatine nan aforesaid clip — by giving successful to his each irrational whim.

Then I would spot really stressed they were trying to disregard their ain hungry, unhappy babies. And I would cognize I was doing nan correct thing.

Nicole Lampert: 'My sister gave maine nan book. Best point she's done' 

I will ne'er hide sitting crying retired of vexation successful that first week aft I brought my boy location from hospital.

I looked from babe book to babe book, nan words swimming successful beforehand of my eyes done exhaustion, for a hint astir what to do astir a newborn that would not sleep.

In my different world I was a occurrence — I was nan Mail's showbusiness editor and my nights were spent partying pinch A-list celebrities.

But successful this caller world of motherhood, I had ne'er felt specified a failure. My boy would beryllium awake each nighttime and I had nary thought really to make him sleep.

And past my sister did perchance nan champion point she has ever done. She slipped maine Gina Ford's babe manual and said 'follow this'.

Within six weeks my boy Ben was sleeping done nan nighttime — a full 8 hours. The beatified grail had been reached.

Gina was not for everyone. In my tofu-swilling breastfeeding-until-they-are-four cervix of nan woods — I unrecorded successful Muswell Hill, North London, which is nicknamed Muesli Hill — Gina Ford's sanction was practically verboten.

But we Gina followers sought each different out. We didn't person acheronian rings nether our eyes — we were nan ones pinch nan sleeping babies and, much than that, a grade of control.

And it was nan deficiency of power complete this mewling, pooing, burping animal that I had brought location that had flummoxed maine nan most.

Why was he crying? Why wouldn't he sleep?

Gina gave maine not only a strict timetable to travel (a useful guideline that I ne'er managed to perfect), which meant I knew erstwhile to provender and erstwhile to put him to bed.

Crucially, it besides meant that if he cried, I had a bully thought why.

Gina said sense. She knows babies, she knows mothers and she knows that location are nary easy answers erstwhile you bring location a newborn.

I'm truthful pleased young mothers still get nan use of her proposal moreover if they person to susurration her sanction to each other.

Anna Maxted: 'I ditched manual... a triumph for my intelligence health'  

'Remember Gina Ford?' I opportunity to my husband.

'The crying babe woman?' he replies — 'Ugh. I get nan logic — if you were moving parents, and couldn't spend to beryllium awake half nan night. But it sends a beautiful profound connection to nan child, doesn't it?'

Quite. Nonetheless, 22 years ago, we were frightened novice parents. So we turned to nan master and The New Contented Little Baby Book.

My problem was not being capable to nutrient overmuch bosom milk. Consequently, for nan first fortnight my babe was half-starved, sucking distant connected nothing.

So erstwhile I tried to enforce a neat regular of precisely-timed naps, arsenic she suggested, he would roar his caput off.

He's hungry, said my mother. Ford wasn't truthful sure.

'A well-meaning grandma whitethorn effort to person you that your baby's fretfulness is owed to hunger, that you are astir apt not producing capable beverage to fulfill him... Please beryllium reassured... if your babe wholly empties a breast... and is offered nan different one, he will not spell hungry.'

My babe mislaid complete 10 per cent of his assemblage weight and nan infirmary maternity caregiver shouted astatine maine to supplement pinch look ('He needs it medically!').

But I was wary. Mainly acknowledgment to nan National Childbirth Trust. But besides Ford mentioned 'nipple confusion' caused by vessel feeding much than erstwhile a day, perchance putting him disconnected nan breast.

However, nan connection 'medically' penetrated my brain. So I fed my ravenous, wakeful babe look erstwhile he needed it — 'feeding connected demand' arsenic nan organization nurse advised. I felt bad astir it, however, and went half-mad trying to summation my ain beverage production. I paid for costly breastfeeding advisers, drank stinking fennel tea, ate for illustration a pig — each to nary avail.

To Ford it was each reasonably simple: 'One of nan reasons nan mostly of my mothers are truthful successful astatine breastfeeding is because I promote nan usage of an electrical expressing machine.' But I pumped relentlessly, moreover getting up astatine 6am aft a nighttime of surgery slumber to pump again, and still . . . not enough. I realise location is much nuance successful her proposal than she is fixed in installments for. But it was easy to judge I was a faulty mother.

And past 1 day, reference nan book again, wretched and red-eyed pinch exhaustion, I came crossed nan line: 'It is overmuch easier to enslaved pinch a happy, contented babe than an irritable, fretful 1 who needs changeless feeding and rocking.'

Well, yes, can't reason pinch that, Gina — but equally, rather an unsympathetic publication of nan full principle of babyhood. I saw consciousness — it was my occupation to accommodate to my newborn's needs, not nan different measurement round.

The time I ditched that book was a triumph for my intelligence health. My babe and I bonded arsenic I soothed his crying, fed him erstwhile he was quiet and rocked him to sleep. I felt bully astir that, and I still do.